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1) I can't just wing it on the Suzuki violin vol 4 piano accompaniments. No—must actually practice. And I hardly have the discipline for that. Upside—piano has its solo parts too. But that's no upside if I can't play them.
2) How to turn off the insistently overyacking GPS navigator in the Audi after I've reached my "destination" and it insists on redirecting me back to it, again and again? Step one—press "NAV". (That's right—to initiate turning it off, select it—it's not relevant that I'm already f**king around with the NAV screens (!)). Then select "Stop route guidance." Done. Why was this so hard?
3) Mysterious cell phone behavior? Turn the phone off. Then turn it on. Problem solved. Why was this so hard?
4) Another kid, to Owen, as they both awaited their violin assessments: "You're not nervous?" Owen: "No." Kid's parent: "Wow, I can't believe that." Me: "Yes, I don't get it either. My older son, he's the same way. I hated taking tests, giving recitals. My kids, it's like they're from some other planet or something." Other kid: "Right, anything with the word 'test' in it, and I'm sick to my stomach." Me, to other parent: "Sometimes, I wonder, why am I nervous, when my kid isn't? Seems kind of stupid." Other parent: "It must be genetic or something. Is your wife some kind of supercalm person?" Me: "No." [added later: Gloria: "Yes."] Owen, on coming out of his assessment: "That was fun." Me: "So, you did everything perfectly, or what?" Owen: "It was OK. I messed up on one arpeggio, the A major subdominant. But fun." Me: "OK."
What is the lesson here?
I've been browsing a NASA report given to Congress this month titled Near Earth Object Survey and Deflection Analysis of Alternatives.
The report lists the pros and cons of various ways stopping gigantic rocks from falling from the sky and either ending life "as we know it" (how *do* we know it, anyway, I've always wondered?), or if not that, causing so much damage as to render moot this (and every other) question that might come to mind.
I've had a bit of difficulty, conceptually, with the term NEAR EARTH OBJECT, since it suggests something that's always lurking in our Earthly neighborhood, maybe hiding behind the moon, or tracking our planet like a malevolent highwayman, hiding in the Earth's penumbra. Surely these NEOs just swing by occasionally in the elliptical fashion, and are only truly deserving the NEO name when they've got a chance to hit the bulleye? That's got to be the case, right?
Or maybe some of these giant rocks are even in orbit around the Earth? Or whipping around the moon in an unstable, numerically threatening orbit?
This report seems to say no, the rocks of interest are on orbits that correspond roughly to what I'd imagined. This diagram helped clear up the situation for me:
So there you have it, four possible horsemen of the apocalypse: Apollo, Aten, Amor, and Apohele.
I'm not surprised to find these devils all have names that start with "A".
A story by Owen (3rd grader)
* * *
Once there was a frog who liked to trick animals. One day a fox was walking along the river when he saw [the] frog. Frog said, "Fox, why don't you come and visit me on the water?" He was [on] his lily pad. The Fox said, "How am I supposed to visit you on the water?" The frog said coolly "why don't you walk on some lily pads?" So the fox jumped and fell and drowned and the current dragged the frog under and he drowned [too].
MORAL: Never trick somebody. It might backfire on you.
* * *
It got crushed under The Mathematica Handbook on my desk, but I rescued it.
I downloaded a trial version of software called Portrait Professional, ("The world's first touch up software that actually knows about human beauty.") It's meant to automatically "enhance" a photo of a person's face.
I took a photo of myself and then set all the sliders ("Face Sculpt", "Skin", "Eyes", "Teeth", "Lighting", and "Picture") to their maximum settings, reckoning I could surely use all the help I could get.
I also set the "Spot Removal" control to "LEVEL 10: MAXIMUM SENSITIVITY".
Scary stuff!
